Not Easy

I locked the door 
When you left
I'm not sure why
And what for
I layed there, 
down on the cold floor
Shoulders resting 
Against the wall
Staring at nothing
Going through it all
Thinking that 
This is what the dead
Must be feeling
Because I was 
Barely breathing 
Too many god damned
years have gone by
Doing it the same way
Too much heartache 
Too many things to say
But it's never as easy 
as it seems
And yet, I'm still here 
finding you 
In my amazing dreams